Well, I finally reviewed Willard.  A smashingly good film, I must say. 

You know, I've been thinking about the conversation Lea and I had a week ago Monday.  I posted about our ConProgramTeam meeting, but I didn't post about my conversation with Lea afterward.  She was kind enough to give me a ride home, and we ended up talking in my carport long enough that Bruce called and asked where she was.  We talked about a lot of things, but one of the main points our conversation kept returning to was love. 

She had avoided getting married until her thirties, and got divorced eighteen months later.  That was obviously before she met Bruce.  She had purposely avoided marriage for a long time, because her family had a long track record of several marriages to each person.  I'm not sure how much (if anything) about her life she wants revieled on the Internet, so I'll try to come to my point.

She said that a person knows when they've found their lifemate, because it feels wrong to not be with them.  That had me thinking, will I ever know that feeling?  About a woman?  About God?  She speculated that for some people there would be many people who could fill that role, but that for others there might be only one out of billions.  Well, I'll let God sort all that out.  Let His Will be done.  Thus far, I don't see any sort of marriage in my future.  Heck, I don't even see a girlfriend! 

But as I explained, why do I need one right now?  My life is so full, I wouldn't be able to devote the time needed to maintain that relationship and all my other responsibilities.  Something would have to give, and God has yet to entice me with anyone who would make me choose. 

I find the typical dating scene repulsive.  Most singles events are actually events disguised to encourage meeting potential significant others.  I don't do drugs, so the alcohol and tobacco pushed at bars and clubs has no appeal to me.  Nor do the patrons at such places, especially the places that feel like meatmarkets.  *shudder*  Those are the worst.  I always feel unclean after just a few seconds of sharing the same air as those places.  And I certainly won't ever use a service to meet people.  Just how desparate do you have to be to think you need a service to do all the legwork for you?  I mean, a job service makes more sense than a dating service.  Don't people have enough self esteme to live their lives independant of love?  I guess people like Paul McCartney and Kathi Blandin try to teach us otherwise. 

I mean, don't get me wrong.  Romantic love is great.  The few months I dated Sheila were awesome.  The pain afterwards was well worth it.  I'll do it again, but on my terms in my own time.  And if the opportunity presents itself. 

Anyway, I was thinking about all that again today after I realised how most of my successful friends are married and most of my loser friends are not.  And it has me thinking, why is that?  What causes people with direction in their lives to opt for marriage and those who are aimless to avoid it (generally speaking.  There are exceptions to the rule in both categories) ?

Well, Spunky is kneeding my stomach, and I'm getting sleepy.  Both are inhibiting my typing skills.  Night.